"I will not leave you as orphans; I will come to you." John 14:18

Sunday, August 24, 2008

Dear Clayton

Deedle, Deeds, C-diddy, C-dids, buddy, my firstborn son,

As I sit here, I wonder where the time has gone. When did you change from a baby into a big kindergarten boy? As I watch you sleep, you still look like a baby. You still come to me when you are sad or hurt. You have so many questions about things you have yet to experience. Everything you see is exciting and new to you. In my mind, you are still a baby. My baby!!

From the moment I knew you were growing inside of my tummy, I loved you. I never thought I could love anything more.
I was wrong.The moment I heard that first cry come from your deep little voice my love grew even more for you. I was overwhelmed with joy!! You were the happiest baby. You started out very independent and you still are. I know you will do so well in Kindergarten because you have always been eager to try and do new things.
I have found myself this weekend trying to go over everything I have ever taught you. Be polite. Say "yes ma'am" and "no ma'am". Be kind to others. No roaring at other kids. No burping at school....the list goes on. I keep thinking, "What if I forgot to teach you something? What if you forget?" But, what I really want is for you to just be yourself. Be the fun-loving, energetic, and silly boy that we know.
(1 year old)
Four years ago, we dedicated your life to the Lord. I have never had any difficulty loving you. The hardest part is letting you go. We told God on that day that you are His child and that we would trust in Him to take care of you and watch over you. I have to remember this as I send you off to Kindergarten. I won't be there to watch you and take care of you, but I have faith and trust that God will take extra special care of you. He loves you more that you could ever imagine.
At two, you started to love dinosaurs. You knew their names, how big they where, and what kind of food they ate. I love hearing you in your room playing with your dinosaurs. You are so creative and I hope that your imagination continues as you grow.

(Two year old)
I am so excited for what you have ahead of you. You are going to make so many friends. You are going to learn and see so many new things. You are going to learn things that you will carry with you the rest of your life.
(Three year old)
You are such a great kid. Don't let anyone ever tell you different.
(four year old)
We are going to be heading down a new path. It will be different and maybe scary sometimes, but I want you to know that no matter what, Mommy and Daddy will always love you and always be here for you. I love you, Deeds!
"I'll love you forever, I'll like you for always, as long as I'm living, my baby you'll be"


Jonna said...

Good grief Erica...are you trying to make me cry? :) Hugs to you as you send him off!

Brandie said...

My word, Im gonna cry now!